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Dis a note from my myspace friend Cara, who about to be fired cuz she can't put on no headphones at work, so she listen to the show on her computer speakers. Then her boss threatens to fire her if she laughs one more time. You and Chocolate Cake need to quit your jobs, please. He got babies spittin in his mouth and you got a boss that don't allow laughing.
"Lady. I started listening and was immediately laughing so hard I had to press "stop" because I am here at work and they send you home if you act too much like a dumb-ass. Can you PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE type up your blogs so I can read them silently here at work? Please? I understand about the laziness, I too like to wear elastic-waist pants so it's easier to go pee, but Lady, please. Type up your blogs again because if my boss hears me hearing you and hears me laughing at you, then my ass be fired."So, I am blogging my thoughts for Cara despite my desire to record them. Much easier as I am lazy as a shoe on a foot that don't want to be work no more.
Basically, it was brought to my attention by Paul (who has a blue and white profile photo. Color, please. I want to see yo face) that Sears be making "portraits" like the one above. Child Uh-buse please. I would say this be worse than Snoopi's broke back story, but this little girl probably walked away from the scene of the crime unharmed, but obviously emotionally scarred from dresing up like a 97 year old woman. Who is the mother who had this "portait" made? Someone please cll child protective services on her a** now and get this child into a loving home. Don't bring her to me, though. I am too busy to take cre of no child. Plus hse probably retarded now that she been "portraited" by Sears.
In other news, I got a man last night at a party thrown by Tiki. She was celebrating something that involved free liquor so I came. I was sprawled out on the couch eatin cheetos and drankin something when this tall dark hunk of man-stallion come walking up at me, asking if he could hold twenty dollars till pay day. He look like he about to french kiss my lady place any second, so I gve him the twenty dollars. Never seent him again till the end of the party. I caught him kissing this white girl. I touched his shoulder and he shoved me to the ground. I got up, wiped the juice that was on the carpet off my face and ran at him like a machine gun, punching the back of his head till he fell to the ground. He was convulsing and shaking. I pick him up and carry his retarded a** back to my apartment for some sweet loving.
Today I marched in a parade for equal rights for women. We are not allowed to vote in this county, so we was protesting. I had a banner that said "Just cuz I am a woman don't mean I am stupid, ho!" The organizer lady asked me to take the sign down and hold one of her "approved" signs. It said "Ladies need to vote!" I told her my sign was more effective and to the point. She told me if I did not take down my sign, which was attached to my wig, I would have to leave the parade. I said fine, ulled my lighter out my purse, ran to each and every sign she had people holding and lit them all on fire. People was screaming, dropping the signs. I pick them all up and continue the parade alone, carrying about ten burning signs chanting, "Women got to vote, ho, women got to vote!" I was incarcerated but got ouut after 20 minutes due to lack of a prior record. I paid someone off a year ago to tget that prior record cleaned. Only cost me a stolen car.
Please...do not judge.
-LR
